REMINISCING

I still remember how I got into this world; a world that I didn't really know until the third month of exploring. 

The Sleeping Dinosaur, Mati, Davao Oriental

It was not my intention to find a job at that time 'coz I was still working for a local company in the country. I was browsing Facebook when a message popped out of the window saying that someone’s looking for an article writer. Out of curiosity and excitement, I immediately accepted the invitation and prepared a little for the interview. That was the time I first encountered JMR. She was the team’s Team Leader when I applied for social media content post writing. She then connected me to ME, the Post Production manager. I found her strong and strict based from her replies and the way she asked me questions about myself. Five minutes and it felt like 2 hours talking to her on Skype. Whew! My hands were sweating and freezing at the same time because of nervousness. The thing that broke the ice was when she asked me about my experience in sales and marketing. “So I assume you are an expert in that field,” she said and I replied; “Well as far as my confidence is concerned, I would say, yes.” I didn't expect her to respond like we’re having fun but she said, “That made my day, thank you.” Whew again, and I smiled. 

After the interview, I was redirected to JMR for a brief introduction and orientation about my job. And just after the short briefing, I started writing using the samples she gave me as my guide. I was introduced to my team and found good friends; MJE, NRD, SST, RC, and JMR herself. RC was a bit harsh at first with her feedbacks about my work and gave me some pointers to improve. Few days later, I slowly fell in love with the team and the BIGGER team, and found my labs, LC. I found a FAMILY. 

Just a month after I got hired, a great news came. The bosses are coming to meet us. WHOA!! So since the announcement, I practiced talking to myself in English, so I will be prepared if they talk to me or ask me something. That’s what’s supposed to happen, right? But the expected breath-taking scene was reversed. The Boss, DLR or also known as MBD was not mean like Simon Cowell; opposite from what I thought he was. When he opened his arms for us, we welcomed him wholeheartedly and found a TRUE friend in him. That was like “Unity of Two Species.” BOOM!! So, a new friendship was born. DLR, JA, NJDR, RP, GPC, MLC, JMR, NRD, LMS, AL, PMT, KT – The Originals. LOL. Having these people gave me more reasons to continue walking through my journey in the company. I never had dull moments with them. Everyone was always happy with the others’ company. We share hunger, disappointments, and dismay, which all turn into laughter every time we chat. We were invincible.

But the small family started to grow bigger and bigger as the demand got higher and higher; an inevitable phase of our life as a FAMILY. Sometimes we’re on a calm ocean, sometimes we were shaken by huge waves. That is how a wheel works. When hurricane K hit the home, it was already on intensity 4 where we had to put up a task force. We were unified by one goal, that was to survive and kick the hurricane K’s ass off of his eye wall. That’s when I found the other MM. (The rest is history.)

Of course, we surpassed the challenge brought by HK, and we rejoiced for the win. And that’s how the world began to turn heavier. People were thirsty of attention and power that changed the atmosphere to something I’ve always disliked. The healthy home of the family I’ve known has turned into a POLITICAL BATTLEFIELD. Envy, greediness, hypocrisy, and pride took over love and unity. 

I was lonely. I felt the pressure that everyone else also felt. Stress, depression, and frustration outgrew my happy, hopeful, and cheerful heart. I felt unsecured. Even with the threats from above, I strived so hard to protect my family members; the family that DLR created. I became their guardian. Months have passed and I was able to survive because of my eagerness to stay and make my small family a little bigger. I did. I tried. I was willing to fight for them, and I really did. I just couldn’t help but admit to myself that there will always be people who’ll try to pull you down, or climb up at the expense of others. I know. I have encountered them. I certainly know them. I was confused with things that I didn’t know; things that were sealed from us. :x 

I did not write this “short story” to rant or express negative feelings. I would like to say that we all have DREAMS. We all want to be somebody; someone that we wanted to be since World War 1. We all wish to be on a pedestal where everyone would look up to us. But if we really want to be on that position, we also need to think of others. Our dreams are connected, so do our lives. We do not only breathe for our own circulatory system to work. We work and live for our family, for the people around us, for our colleagues, for our teammates, for our adopted FAMILY, and for ourselves. We need to find our purpose in life and live with it. When we think of going up but someone has to fall down first; isn't that unfair or selfish or envious? Let’s say you are now up there, glorifying yourself for making it. Is that your purpose? Do you even call that a PURPOSE?

Now you have a team. You have your own small family. If that is your biological family, will you try to dominate using dirty plans? Will you kill your brother for your own PURPOSE? For your family to grow, you need to help them. If you know something that they don’t, tell them. Tell them as long as it’s not going to compromise your own work. Help them understand instead of doing it by yourself (so you’ll be the one to get the reward). Say what you think and start a conversation to fix things together. Laugh with them. Break the ice. Throw a joke even if it’s a thumb down. Make them feel trusted as you want them to trust you. Do things together so you’ll rise together. Recognize your neighbor’s achievement, be happy for them. Do not envy. Work hard to get what you deserve.

A friend told me this when I decided to leave; “Happiness is a choice.” Yes, it is. That’s why I chose to find my happiness in another way, in a different world. I did not leave to escape. I did it to give myself a time to find what I might have ignored. I chose to go to see things away from the pressure, and within a short period of time, I learned to understand. Well at least, maybe in my own understanding and in my own perception of “what is happening”. 

In the end, my decision matters and I know it makes a BIG SENSE. 

“There are some things success is not. It's not fame. It's not money or power. Success is waking up in the morning so excited about what you have to do that you literally fly out the door. It's getting to work with people you love. Success is connecting with the world and making people feel. It's finding a way to bind together who have nothing in common but a dream. It's falling asleep at night knowing you did the best job you could. Success is joy and freedom and friendship. And success is love.”

-Jenny Garrison, FAME (2009)

(It's Gonna Make Sense: Michael Learns to Rock)

Note: I chose to use initials of the people included in this post for their privacy.